Graduating college during a pandemic was not on my agenda for 2020. As I attended my virtual graduation ceremony, I panicked at the idea of finding a job in the legal field. With the courts shutting down and my connections to better opportunities dwindling by the minute, I knew that becoming a paralegal was a slim chance. Even with all of the odds stacked against me, I never stopped searching for a legal assistant position.
For months, I made countless phone calls, submitted my resume through multiple job sites, and followed up with several firms about my application. Even with all of my efforts, I was still coming up short. I finally decided to take a temporary administrative position at a property management firm after getting a phone call from the temp agency I was working with.
I was initially hesitant about working there because the job wasn’t in my field of interest. I didn’t know anything about the real estate industry and I thought that God had bigger plans for me. Since there were no alternatives at the time, I convinced myself to stay at the firm. I kept thinking that maybe God answered my prayers in an unconventional way.
After pushing myself to the brink of exhaustion, God stopped me in my tracks and forced me to do some self-reflection. At that point, I decided to leave the firm and seek out better opportunities. To say that I was devastated would be an understatement. I kept theorizing about how I could’ve changed the outcome of the situation.
The truth is, I began to doubt God’s plan for my life. I felt as if He blessed my peers with their dream jobs while I had to settle for less. I was upset that God closed doors to great opportunities while allowing me to gain access to positions that left me anxious and burnt out. In my moments of disappointment, God taught me four important lessons:
- You need to rest
I became a workaholic at my previous job. While my body was warning me to slow down, I decided to keep pushing. I depended on my own abilities rather than trusting that God would provide for me. During my hiatus, I learned that it’s important to pace myself and rest frequently. God’s Word reminds me in Psalm 23:1, “The Lord is my shepherd. I lack nothing.” God showed me that I needed to slow down, take inventory, and rest in His provision for my life. Although I decided to make the transition out of that company, I still had the support of my family and friends who encouraged me and reminded me that God is still in control.
2. You are worth more than your accomplishments
As a recent college graduate, I expected to achieve greatness. I believed that my degree in Politics, Philosophy, and Economics was the key to unlocking my path to success in law. I wanted to prove that I had what it takes to be successful. Unfortunately, 2020 had other plans. During my career shift, I had more time to reflect on why I pressured myself into being the perfect employee. I discovered that my self-worth was based on my accolades rather than my identity as a child of God. Instead of surrendering my desire for control to God, I strived for perfection which left me feeling drained. Being unemployed allowed me to spend more time with God and to cultivate a habit of seeking His Will over my own (Matthew 6:33). As I studied scripture, I learned that trusting in God’s faithfulness is greater than my desire to be perfect.
3. Look at the birds
While I was working, I kept telling myself that my success at the firm was determined by my efforts. I put so much pressure on myself to gain my boss’s approval and prove that I’m an asset to the company. Although I prayed every morning before I started work, I found myself struggling to trust in God’s ability to carry me through. I tried to fill multiple positions when the firm was short staffed. I took on more tasks than I could handle and stayed overtime most nights to finish extra projects. I became completely self-reliant, which caused more anxiety about maintaining a stellar work ethic.
My desire for perfection consumed me and made me lose sight of God’s plan for me. Jesus reminded me to look at the birds and know that “they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” (Matthew 6:26). My quest for success prevented me from trusting that God would provide my every need. Through His mercy, God reminded me that He’ll always take care of me and that His plans for me are good (Romans 8:28).
4. Trust the Coach
I gained this lesson from a bible study called, “The Connect.” I was invited to join the study by one of my mentors. The message focused on the importance of relying on the coach during the fourth quarter. That night, God showed me that I desired control more than committing my life to Him. To be honest, I had a difficult time trusting God when all of my plans fell through. It seemed as if God and I weren’t on the same page when it came to my career goals. During the bible study, I realized that striving for perfection prevented me from fully surrendering to God’s Will.
Afterwards, I decided to pray. I started asking, “Lord, what are your plans for me? How do I fulfill my purpose?” In those quiet moments, God reminded me that I needed to trust His plan. Of course, it’s much easier to trust God when life is going our way. Trusting God is a process that requires radical faith. Proverbs 3:5 encourages me to “trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding.” I learned that trusting God is an act of exchanging your blueprint for His master playbook.
As I write this article, I’m grateful that God blessed me with another opportunity (ironically, it’s another position in the real estate industry). My season of rest helped me gain a better perspective of God’s sovereignty in my life. While I was disappointed that my paralegal dreams didn’t pan out, I thank God that His plans are always better than mine. I encourage you ladies to trust that God’s plans are “to prosper you, not to harm you; to give you a hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11). Despite our disappointments, God is working all things together for our good.
“We delight in success. But we may despair when we seem to fail. Keep doing what God has called you to do- and leave the results to Him.” -David H. Roper
Sarah I. Fox 
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