Why am I Single?

#1: I want to be grounded in the Lord. 

This is my number one reason for why I’m still single. Over the past few months, I realized that my main purpose for being a Christian is to know the Lord Jesus Christ and become more like him. In John 17:3, Jesus explains that eternal life is knowing God the Father and becoming one with him. Call me a Jesus freak, but this is my main purpose for living. At the ripe young age of 12, I purposed in my heart that I wanted to glorify God with my life and that is what I still aim to do. To me, having a boyfriend right now would distract me from this goal. Once I am grounded in Christ, then everything else will fall into place (Matthew 6:33).

#2: I am learning how to trust. 

One of the biggest issues for me is trust. In my opinion, trust is earned. I’ve had many experiences in my life where I put my trust in people who didn’t deserve it. To be honest , when I am in a relationship, I always give 110% to the person that I am in that relationship with. Many times, I make the mistake of putting my trust in people instead of God. Proverbs 3:5&6 says that my faith and trust should be in the Lord. If I trust that God would lead me to the right guy instead of trusting that this guy would fulfill the needs of my heart, the Lord will direct my path into marrying the man that He has in mind for me.

#3: I’m still growing.

Many teenagers my age have a significant other. When I was in high school, many of my friends asked me why I never had a boyfriend. I would casually respond that I wasn’t ready for that kind of commitment. To be honest, I am very young and I still have my whole life ahead of me. I am still learning and maturing in life and I don’t want my future boyfriend to have to babysit me. If I meet a guy, I want to be ready for him.

#4: Education matters to me. 

Before I go any further on that, let me say that being in a relationship can affect your status in school. I’m not saying that academics are the only thing that matters, I’m just saying that education is one of my top priorities. As I said earlier, being in a relationship might become a big distraction for me. Trying to manage having a boyfriend and maintaining my GPA is not an easy task. I believe that having a good foundation in the educational aspect of life can help you to achieve whatever it is you want to achieve. Knowledge and wisdom are the two things that can never be taken away from you. True knowledge and wisdom comes from God. If he blesses me with these two things, why not use it to become successful and make something of myself? (Proverbs 1:7)

#5: I want to get married.

If I ever want to get into a relationship, my intention is marriage. I use to have the wrong mindset of dating just to gain experience. After a long conversation with my mom, I learned that this was a bad motive to have. It is unfair to get into a relationship with someone just to pull the rug out from underneath them and say that it was never a serious relationship. I personally believe that if you’re dating someone, you should have the intent to get married. What’s the point of dating just to have fun? If the relationship doesn’t work out that’s a different story, but marriage is my end goal. God takes marriage very seriously. When a couple gets married God sees the two becoming one. As they are saying their vows, God sees the couple coming together to be one flesh (Genesis 2:24). This is a very serious bond. If I know that I am not ready for this commitment, in my opinion, there is no need for me to be dating.

#6: I need to care about others. 

This may come off as a stupid reason, but in my opinion, it is the most important one. Jesus said in Mark 12:30-31, that as a Christian, I need to love the Lord with all my heart, soul, and mind. I also need to love my neighbor as myself. If I am going to be in a relationship, I have to care about the person who I am in this relationship with. It wouldn’t make any sense to be with someone that I don’t care about. If I say that I love God, I have to love others as well (1 John 4:7-8). In order to love others, I have to love myself. Once I master loving and being comfortable with who I am, I can love others better. I can learn how to care for others without losing sight of my own value. As I said before, I am still growing and learning. Being in a relationship takes work on both ends. If I want to be in a relationship, I have to be committed to work through our ups and downs.

Those were my reasons for being single. I pray that this was an encouragement to you whether you are single or in a relationship. May God bless you wherever you are and please pray for me as I pray for you as we take this journey called life one step at a time. If you have some reasons for why you’re single or any relationship advice, please comment. Thank you.